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Kinda Funny

Last 25 added to site

They should call it Tumblickr. It's got a ring to it. #Yahoo
In the middle of Yahoo-Tumblr acquisition day, Yahoo announces that Flickr gets a huge revamp including a totally new look and feel
Bradley A. Clark
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Hmmmm, so this will be an eye phone... ;-)
New Samsung Galaxy phone might be controlled by your eyes
Lainey
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Microsoft argues that, with Surface Pro, you don't need a MacBook Air. In tech marketing, this is known as the Surface-to-Air missile.
On the debut of the Microsoft Surface Pro tablet.
@rossrubin
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...the M5 is a breathtaking, world-blurring outrage, a fast car for real nutters, people whose egos generate their own weather.
BMW M5: Too smoothly outrageous for America
Dan Neil
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Just because you have Tang in your kitchen doesn't make you an astronaut.
Meet the Most Spoiled Kids in the World.
Doug S
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STARTUP LIKE VOLTRON. FIVE LIONS UNITE TO FORM UNSTOPPABLE FORCE. IF ONE LION TAKE NAP INSTEAD OF FIGHT? THEN VOLTRON SCREWED.
Fake Grimlock answer reader questions about how make startup awesome
@FAKEGRIMLOCK
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If they catch her and lock her up, she is just going to bust out again...
Somewhere in Australia there's a "buxom bandit" on the run. That's what Australian media has dubbed a gas station robber with an affinity for deadly weapons and low-cut shirts.
Wade C
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When the chess game is over, the pawn and the king go back in the same box. You should think about that.
Judge scolds Microsoft and Motorola for 'hubris' and arrogance in patent case
U.S. District Judge James Robart
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We’re obviously not talking Tiger Woods here, but I was unfaithful.
De La Hoya admits cheating on his wife and drug addiction
Oscar De La Hoya
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The pain was so bad that I guess I wasn't afraid to die.
An 86-yr-old Arizona man survived falling face-first into his pruning shears.
Leroy Luetscher
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The student isn't a highlander. I didn't see anybody getting their head cut off while somebody else says, 'There can be only one!'
A black teenager sues Arkansas school district, contending her high school discriminated against her by refusing to let her be sole valedictorian even though she had the highest GPA.
Richard-1971294
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Clearly this is Bruce Lee's form of Hacky Sack. Chuck Norris joined in after counting to infinity for the third time.
Kung Fu Volleyball or Kung Fu Soccer?
ModulatedTesticle
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We just had a kid, so she's looking forward to Miller Lite.
The MillerCoors brewing company will soon be forced to pull 39 brands of beers from every restaurant, bar and liquor store in the state of Minnesota.
Andrew Oliver
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Closeness has nothing to do with Distance.
via Twitter
@BjTheTruth
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Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.
via Twitter
@avin24
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are these camels filtered or non-filtered. My dad always told me camels would kill me... little did I know what he meant at the time.
Farting Camels on Carbon Hit List
jay
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There comes a time when you have to choose between turning the page and closing the book.
via Twitter
@MyKindOfQuotes
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The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one.
via Twitter
@HiddenQuotes
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Status: Wanted by many, taken by none, looking at some, waiting for one.
via Twitter
@TheRandomWords
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Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer.
via Twitter
@EternalQuotes
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I know sometimes it feels like all the doors in your life are closed. But remember this, closed does not mean locked.
via Twitter
@TPAIN
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Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
via Twitter
@EpicTweets_
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There's a reason the rear-view mirror is small and the windshield is big; where you are headed is much more important than what you left behind.
via Twitter
@MissQuotaholic
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Expecting life to treat you well because you’re a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you’re a vegetarian.
via Twitter
@MissQuotaholic
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When you're sober you think twice before you speak but when you're drunk you speak twice before you think.
via Twitter
EpicTweets_
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Kinda Sad

Last 25 added to site

Next thing you know, companies will be offering insurance policies to protect you against your insurance policy not paying.
Canadian Mom Billed Almost $1 Million After Unexpectedly Going Into Early Labor On Vacation
Bob Johnson
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As robots get faster, smarter and cheaper (and people don't) the wealth they create goes to he who owns them.
Middle-class troubles in one chart
Bob Willburn
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Most everything favors the wealthy. Get used to it...
It will soon get easier to buy a home — but don’t do it
John Kelly
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These young grads have learned less than I have forgotten.
Millennials want to work from home when they can, creatively collaborate with others, and have random Fridays off.
Daryl Gidley
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Hayden Christensen couldn't have chemistry with a beaker and bunsen burner.
On-Screen Couples Who Have ZERO Chemistry
Molly Scott
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...In a few years smartphones will be in the bottom of cereal boxes.
Amazon wants to offer a phone for free, without a contract
gandalfSVG
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If I had a nickel for every time I was sacked for being too good looking, I would be broke.
Iowa court reaffirms it was OK to fire 'irresistible' worker
felino2012
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A Lannister always pays her debts.
Lena Headey Broke? 'Game Of Thrones' Star Claims To Have Less Than $5 In Her Bank Account
TRMS
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...almost all the great athletes in any sport were singularly driven individuals who didn't play well with others.
Michael Jordan at 50: A celebration of ruthlessness
David Aldridge
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To beef or not to beef... that is equestrian.
Burger King UK admits to horse meat in burgers
Pretz
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We have to get a night nurse or we're going to get a divorce because someone's got to sleep in this house or we're going to kill each other.
Megan Fox says raising new son with husband too hard, hires a nurse
Megan Fox
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I want to know who was the first person who said out loud, 'Hey guys, you know what would make us even more cool? If we played with the new guy's butt'.
Maine West High School Sued For Student Hazing, Sodomy 'Sanctioned By Coaches'
ewwthatsnasty
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Even without Hostess, there will always be plenty of Ding Dongs in this country...
Hostess Brands Inc. said Friday it filed a motion with U.S. Bankruptcy Court to close its business and sell its assets after a strike by its workers.
Adam Cauble
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Bottoms up!
Tennessee fraternity suspended after alcohol enemas
neverland911
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Facebook’s opening day on the NASDAQ had all the excitement of a Matlock rerun.
After all the hullabaloo about Facebook’s IPO, this is how it ends, with a mere $0.23 jump in share price?
Todd Wasserman
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Great. Now I have 8 GB in Dropbox, 5 GB in GDrive, 25 GB in Skydrive, and now 20 GB in Amazon Cloud. I HAZ TOO MUCH CLOUD STORAGE!
Amazon launches Cloud Drive desktop app for Mac, Windows
Gandalthewhite
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This company continues to show up to the party after all the the ice is gone, the beer is warm, the ashtrays are all full, and the women are all taken. Go back to sleep Microsoft.
The news is that Microsoft will invest $300 million in Barnes & Noble. This is a very low risk way for the software giant to break into eBook readers.
fullsteamahead
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We can barely extract drinking water from our salty seas on Earth, but these guys are going to suck it out of an asteroid tumbling through space and turn it into breathable air and rocket fuel?
In response to Planetary Resources's plans to mine rare metals from asteroids.
Al Lewis
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When your signature dish is hamburger in between a doughnut, and you've been cheerfully selling this stuff knowing all along that you've got Type 2 Diabetes... It's in bad taste if nothing else.
Anthony Bourdain on Paula Deen announcing that she has Diabetes and landing a multimillion-dollar deal to endorse a diabetes drug.
Anthony Bourdain
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Gaining traction for Microsoft has been like driving a pickup truck through a Wisconsin winter on bald tires.
Robert Weinstein's analysis of tech stocks in 2011 including Google, Yahoo and Microsoft.
Robert Weinstein
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I overcame my Tiger Mother in my book called Tiger Mother: Son of a Bitch. She was worse than Amy Chua.
NEED TO KNOW | 'Tiger Mom' Amy Chua responds to uproar | PBS
moshetbuitz
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So what this really means is that two hot chicks from Santa Barbara are now available.
Missing ATVers found dead in Mojave Desert
Bajamark
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Andy Rooney is the first Internet troll.
One of Andy Rooney's 60 Minutes segments comparing his old typewriter to the several computers he's owned.
Indojackal
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What is this world coming to when a man can't go in and take a leisurely dump, without scrambling F-16 Chimichanga pilots to interrupt him?
Flight on 9/11 anniversary ends in handcuffs for housewife
Hugh Jorgan
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Hide yours kids, hides your wife! Google just might buy them and take them away!
Google has placed one of its biggest bets on location to date, acquiring local reviews giant Zagat.
Josh Howton
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